Though there are many similarities between all cases of WD, some curious things happen. Like this one for instance; as much as anhedonia (the inability to experience any type of joy, fulfillment and pleasure) usually is a quite stubborn symptom, in some it's less intense than in others, even in early WD. If you were one of such cases, please share your experience.
Keep walking. Just keep walking.
Emotions is one of my biggest problem; my anhedonia is more a no interest to things, to only a few things, no passion
12 years paxil(9 years only 10 mg) - cold turkey(1,5 month) and switch celexa tapered 1 year 20 mg
62 years old - for GAD - 4 years 3 months meds free [since april 2009]
vegetables soup - orange (vit C) - curcuma - some meat or fish
I have had a dampened ability to enjoy things throughout recovery, but I've never related to the term anhedonia, because I've been out of my mind with terror. That has overshadowed anything else.
Meds free since June 2005.
"An initiation into shamanic healing means a devaluation of all values, an overturning of the profane world, a peeling away of inveterate handed-down notions of the world, liberation from everything preconceived. For that reason, shamanism is closely connected with suffering. One must suffer the disintegration of one's own system of thought in order to perceive a new world in the higher space."
-- Holger Kalweit
I still have no desire to do art/craft, both huge passions of mine in the past. I think it is not only the emotions being dumbed down, but it just seems like a huge effort to even THINK about getting out paint or fabric and to even THINK what i might do!
I have noticed that my pleasure of nature is much better than our last trip in March. I am enjoying the scenery more and I like to see birds and while I was walking today, I saw some just coasting in the wind, above the river, maybe flying in the wind currents. They were enjoying it and I am learning to (being forced to) enjoy doing NOTHING! So I think they were trying to tell me something!
You are mentioning LOTS of things I can relate to. A follow-up question; in your best window - were you already able to forget you are in WD? Not talking here even days or hours at a time, but literally moments of it?
Keep walking. Just keep walking.
weirdly, before I had the big panic attack that led me to RIing citalopram which I now realise was w/d kicking in, I had a row with my hubby I remember at the time thinking, this is weird, I dont have any emotion about this, I deffo noticed it but shrugged it off.
That was obviously part of w/d also and some anhedonia, usually I would have been angry and very upset having an argument but I just felt nothing.
In my worst part of this when I couldnt speak or move I couldnt tell if I had it or not because I was so consumed by the other more pressing symptoms but now I am cycling, when I get bad depression which usually only lasts a week or less I also get anhedonia but no where near as bad as others have, in fact this week I have engaged in activities like arts and crafts that I have always enjoyed but have not been able to face.
I can also look forward to things like certain tv programs and I enjoy my food and taste it no problem.
So even though I am in a terrible state with super high anxiety etc Im not bothered by anhedonia very often, but I have experienced it/
Put on citalopram July 2009 during a physical illness - didnt need it. 40mg
went down to 20mg July 2010 CT in Jan 2012 - 2.5 years on.
Tried to restart July 2012 due to 1 panic attack (never had one before - start of CT W/D) - adverse reaction
Down to 1.5mg from the failed RI
Now at 0.48 and trying to stabalize - been 6 weeks
now have SEVERE anxiety, akathsia, feel like Im on acid 24/7 depression, D/P, signed off work. Scared of everything..please God let me heal from this
I wonder if having a small child helps with anhedonia, I still belive as strong as w/d is NOTHING is as powerful as a mothers love for her child.
Put on citalopram July 2009 during a physical illness - didnt need it. 40mg
went down to 20mg July 2010 CT in Jan 2012 - 2.5 years on.
Tried to restart July 2012 due to 1 panic attack (never had one before - start of CT W/D) - adverse reaction
Down to 1.5mg from the failed RI
Now at 0.48 and trying to stabalize - been 6 weeks
now have SEVERE anxiety, akathsia, feel like Im on acid 24/7 depression, D/P, signed off work. Scared of everything..please God let me heal from this
Iggy -- your lack of emotion in the fight with your husband is a classic side effect of being on the meds or in w/d. And, unfortunately, many parents taking these meds or changing dose do get to the point of feeling apathy towards their children. Luc is just about to post a video that has some great clips about this side effect of ADs.
Meds free since June 2005.
"An initiation into shamanic healing means a devaluation of all values, an overturning of the profane world, a peeling away of inveterate handed-down notions of the world, liberation from everything preconceived. For that reason, shamanism is closely connected with suffering. One must suffer the disintegration of one's own system of thought in order to perceive a new world in the higher space."
-- Holger Kalweit
You and me, both! I am so driven by guilt and worry to be productive all the time. I definitely think I have to trust that it's OK, and ultimately even more productive, to do nothing, commune with nature, play....Originally Posted by grandmaD
Meds free since June 2005.
"An initiation into shamanic healing means a devaluation of all values, an overturning of the profane world, a peeling away of inveterate handed-down notions of the world, liberation from everything preconceived. For that reason, shamanism is closely connected with suffering. One must suffer the disintegration of one's own system of thought in order to perceive a new world in the higher space."
-- Holger Kalweit
That is the tragic truth. I'll be posting the video about it today.
Keep walking. Just keep walking.
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