Well, this is a bold and self-compassionate move, Luc. It's so hard to be pushed in this direction by circumstances, but you know I believe that this is all happening for a reason, and that this illness can be usefully held as an initiation to a new life which the Tao is really pushing us toward.
You also know that I initially kept working full time during the first phase of w/d, but have had to cut back repeatedly over the years to almost nothing.
If this were a conventional psychological disorder, I might say it is better to confront one's fears than to give in to them. But, I did that. For years, in early w/d, I confronted my extreme physical and emotional terror symptoms in driving an hour to a challenging job.
But it never got better. The conventional techniques for mastering anxiety didn't work, because this is not a conventional psychological disorder. It's a neuro-psychological disorder.
So, I got more and more strained and depleted by this technique, and it seemed only humane and rational to cut back on the stressful activities.
Now, finances are a whole topic in w/d! But, somehow, we all muddle through. Good for you for saving some money!
We're still very lucky that we have something that everyone heals from. You are going to heal and you're going to be better than before. I have not the slightest doubt. You'll make even more money than you were making. And you can go back to the old work if you want to, fully or in part. Or you will do something else that makes you even more happy. This descent experience is dismantling you in order to remake you to be even more who you are really supposed to be.
Originally Posted by stan
