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  1. #21
    Founder Luc's Avatar
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    Bruno, all the symptoms you are experiencing is WD *and* the result of the drugs. Please, do not go back on them. In the best of circumstances you will go back to square one. But there's also a high risk of kindling reaction upon reinstating, and ending in an even worse place than you are now.

    It may not feel like it yet, but your body has already done a ton of healing - your going back on ADs would disorient your CNS - it wouldn't really know what to do next (whether to heal or not). Yes, it is rough. No doubt. But abstaining from chemicals is the way to go.
    Keep walking. Just keep walking.

  2. #22
    Member bruno2006's Avatar
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    Well I have gone off 4 times and this has been the longest I have been off. The other 3 times I was able to reinstate without any problems because, in my opinion, my body was crying out for the drug. I already spent so much money on alternatives and my latest deal is the gaps diet which is tough. So, it appears that I have some sort of genetic and biological problem which can only be relieved through drug therapy. I used to not believe this but seeing my family with there drug problems and depression shows me that there are def some issues there and none of them have ever been on these drugs, only me. That's why I don't believe this is withdrawal.
    2004: Effexor-150mg
    2006: switch to paxil-up to 40mg
    2008: after paxil taper failed, went back on effexor-250mg
    2009: quit effexor cold turkey. Switched to zoloft-100mg
    2010: zoloft taper failed, switched to celexa-30mg
    October 2011: tapered celexa in one week

  3. #23
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    Bruno, you know that everytime you go on and off an ssri you become much more sensitised to it, my concern would be that you have an adverse reaction and are not able to tolerate the drug...its all up to you, but 18 months is too long, but not long enough to see full healing, like I asked, have you seen any improvements?

    1) Do you sleep?
    2) do you have free floating anxiety, if not, have you at any other point?

    I hope you find some relief if you decide to RI, but at 18 months out, if you cannot tolerate the RI you end up back at square 1 and all that time is lost.

    Keep us informed whatever you decide, support is here. x
    Put on citalopram July 2009 during a physical illness - didnt need it. 40mg
    went down to 20mg July 2010 CT in Jan 2012 - 2.5 years on.
    Tried to restart July 2012 due to 1 panic attack (never had one before - start of CT W/D) - adverse reaction
    Down to 1.5mg from the failed RI
    Now at 0.48 and trying to stabalize - been 6 weeks
    now have SEVERE anxiety, akathsia, feel like Im on acid 24/7 depression, D/P, signed off work. Scared of everything..please God let me heal from this

  4. #24
    Founder Sheila's Avatar
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    I am just working on an essay for my blog on the enteric brain. It’s not ready yet, but, yes, it’s really fascinating the gut – head connection, and they’re currently learning more every day.

    I gather you’re working while very sick? My hat’s off to you. That’s very impressive.

    OK, I’m not a doctor, all I can tell you is what I would do. Before going back on an AD, I would try mega-dose Omega-3 and/or Vit C. In fact, that’s what I’m doing. There’s threads in the Alternatives sub-forum about both.

    Also, Luc has been experimenting with Apple Cider Vinegar for gut issues. Maybe you can ask him about that.

    Your body has been damaged by the ADs, but it *can* be repaired.

    Also, if I recall, you’re in psychotherapy and you like your therapist? That’s all to the good, but, in my experience, the neuro damage really slows down the efficacy of psychotherapy. It’s still worth it, and the healing is still going on, but it can be very frustrating. You don’t get results as fast.

    Genetics is a very tricky thing. You may have a genetic vulnerability to substance dependence, but we can affect gene expression through epigenetic factors. IOW, your psychotherapy can turn off your substance dependence-related genes.
    Meds free since June 2005.

    "An initiation into shamanic healing means a devaluation of all values, an overturning of the profane world, a peeling away of inveterate handed-down notions of the world, liberation from everything preconceived. For that reason, shamanism is closely connected with suffering. One must suffer the disintegration of one's own system of thought in order to perceive a new world in the higher space."
    -- Holger Kalweit

  5. #25
    Founder Luc's Avatar
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    This place is really worth visiting ---> http://www.earthclinic.com/ You may find something effective for your physical ailments. People share in it their opinions about a given remedy and how it worked in their own case. ACV could be one option.

    Just wanted to emphasize how important it is what Sheila just wrote about epigenetics. Bruno, nothing is written in stone. We can actively change our genetic make-up for the better, even changing our thought process can help with it. I have absolutely no doubt about it. None whatsoever. The thing is these ideas have long been supressed by the mainstream materialistically-oriented science. It's been changing tremendously though - the shift in the scientific field is getting virtually exponential now.
    Keep walking. Just keep walking.

  6. #26
    Member bruno2006's Avatar
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    Thanks for th info, iggy.

    I know it would be a risk to go back to these drugs, but I believe I would have no prob with RI since I have done it several times. However, I know that there will most likely be a day when, 1. I enter poop out! 2. I need to raise the dose, 3. I develop other conditions, 4. My condition becomes worse, etc. I think its easier to take the path of least resistance and just take a pill to feel well. Right now I am stuck. Unable to further my education, job, personal life, etc. My days revolve around work, cooking, exercising, and just sort of being a loner. My relationship with my gf has been put on hold. Luckily, I am able to hang out with a few friends tho.

    Sheila: I am aware of epigenetics and believe in othomolecular psychiatry which is essentially what you are doing with the fish oil and c. I have been to the pfeiffer center an have read the work of joan mathews larson, carl pfeiffer, and abram hoffer who all speak of epigentics. I am currently taking a prescribed nutrient formula based on some lab work. It seemed to help in the beginning, but then things got complicated because of withdrawal syndrome. I also tried the supplements from truehope.com which made me feel good but stimulated me too much. The high dose fish sounds like a good idea.

    What makes things harder for me is the fact that after stopping the drugs, I developed physical problems which I have had to adress on top of trying to deal with the emotional problems associated with withdrawal syndrome. And to add a cherry on top of all that, my father died and I am having to provide money to my mother because of the loss of income from him not working. So, the stress has been enough to cause a normal person to feel overwhelmed and so you can imagine how I have been feeling.

    I am currently in therapy which does help but this guy is more like someone I just talk to and vent with. He is a LPC and doesn't give me much to work with but I can't afford others.

    I still have a couple options avail. I will prob work with a naturopath who specializes in diets like gaps. I may also go to Mensah medical in chicago which works with Bill Walsh (founder of Pfeiffer Center but left in 2008 with the two mensah doctors). Btw, I would encourage you to read the new book by Bill Walsh called "nutrient power". So I have a couple options and things to try but am tired of trying new things. My current MD specializes in alternative medicine and wants me to try amino acids again. He has also suggested a few other things like lecithin and SAMe both of which I have tried with little benefit.

    While on the subject of my MD, he has been having me do some alternative treatments for the colon issues I devloped after stopping the drugs and may be part of the reason I was feeling so bad. You see, I devloped an abscess and he believes I have a fistula and is having me to colloidal silver enemas and probiotic enemas. I know, tell me about it. But, I really don't have a choice because he told me to go see a colorectal specialist but I am uninsured so couldn't and so he told me to do this. Well, colloidal is a pretty strong substance and is likely killing off good and bad things in my colon not to mention possibly releasing toxins. I have seen you post on here about not doing colon hydrotherapy while in wd, but some recommend that like Ann Blake. Although its not exactly colon hydro therapy, it is similar.

    Sorry for TMI. As you can see I have a lot going on. Its no wonder I want relief using a drug.
    2004: Effexor-150mg
    2006: switch to paxil-up to 40mg
    2008: after paxil taper failed, went back on effexor-250mg
    2009: quit effexor cold turkey. Switched to zoloft-100mg
    2010: zoloft taper failed, switched to celexa-30mg
    October 2011: tapered celexa in one week

  7. #27
    Founder Luc's Avatar
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    Fish oil is a very interesting option indeed. This was already posted in the Alternatives, but worth posting again; http://www.psycheducation.org/depres...ds/Omega-3.htm
    Keep walking. Just keep walking.

  8. #28
    Member bruno2006's Avatar
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    yes, I have seen some improvements. I am sleeping well now and the free floating anxiety is not too bad. My joint pain is now pretty much gone but am still having body pains and muscle twitching most days including in my intestines.
    2004: Effexor-150mg
    2006: switch to paxil-up to 40mg
    2008: after paxil taper failed, went back on effexor-250mg
    2009: quit effexor cold turkey. Switched to zoloft-100mg
    2010: zoloft taper failed, switched to celexa-30mg
    October 2011: tapered celexa in one week

  9. #29
    Member bruno2006's Avatar
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    oh and I just started apple cider vinegar (raw organic is best) and raw honey at the request of a naturopath because I did a urinalysis and my ph was 6 so she said the ACV will make me more alkaline. I think the alkaline/acid thing should be taken with a grain of salt. It is said that your body know how to regulate this and just because a food is alkaline or acidic doesnt mean it will have that effect when ingested. But, both the MD and the ND said I was acidic and the MD said add magnesium and the ND the ACV.
    2004: Effexor-150mg
    2006: switch to paxil-up to 40mg
    2008: after paxil taper failed, went back on effexor-250mg
    2009: quit effexor cold turkey. Switched to zoloft-100mg
    2010: zoloft taper failed, switched to celexa-30mg
    October 2011: tapered celexa in one week

  10. #30
    Founder Sheila's Avatar
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    I’m so sorry to hear about your father’s death and the extra financial stress that has brought. No matter what the relationship was like, that death is a big event to go through, especially in w/d.

    And I’m so sorry to hear about the colon abscess / fistula. Did I say not to do colon hydrotherapy? I don’t remember, but if I did I must have been thinking about not doing something that might trigger dysautonomia. But, you clearly have to do something about the abscess, so you’re in a different situation.

    I want to say that you have done a tremendous job of educating yourself and pursuing different strategies. You should be very proud of yourself, regardless of the lack of reward. That’s so difficult in w/d – we look at the lack of progress and think we have done something wrong. But, you clearly have really, really tried, and that is very right.

    The Walsh book looks promising, and we’ll be adding it our IAWP bookstore. Thanks!

    You are certainly going through too much, but I also see that you have had significant improvements, and you do have some new treatment plans just starting.
    Meds free since June 2005.

    "An initiation into shamanic healing means a devaluation of all values, an overturning of the profane world, a peeling away of inveterate handed-down notions of the world, liberation from everything preconceived. For that reason, shamanism is closely connected with suffering. One must suffer the disintegration of one's own system of thought in order to perceive a new world in the higher space."
    -- Holger Kalweit

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